Half-Vaccinated Man is now Only Half-Depressed

Local white man, Vick Vickvictavich, recently joined the many other Americans across the planet in receiving his first vaccine.

“Sometimes I forget to be thankful for good ol’ fashioned American domination, but moments like this are a great reminder.” Vick said on his way back to work after receiving the vaccine.

When he is not busy getting vaccinated, Vick spends the majority of his time as the social media manager for a boutique accounting firm serving high-net worth individuals an hour outside of his hometown. He began this job earlier in the pandemic after being let go from his previous job. While he may be able to complete all his daily tasks remotely, his company likes everyone to be in-person.

“The reason we have everyone working in-person is because I want them to,” said his boss, who has seen a significant increase in his net worth over the past year due to the ultra-rich seeing a significant increase in their net worth. 

His boss continued, “Yes, things have been really hard for many during this time, but what’s great is things have not been hard for me.”

Vick is now counting down the days before getting his next dose. He is keeping busy with his old hobbies of playing video games and cooking, and with his new hobbies of photoshopping funny photos and slowly moving further and further politically left. 

“I’m actually getting pretty decent at photoshop now, and it’s been a great respite from fantasizing about breaking the stronghold that capitalism has on my very existence. I’m doing ok, really.” Vick said without blinking. 

Now it is just a waiting game; this second dose for Vick and many others means a step back toward normalcy. It means movies and restaurants, seeing friends and family, taking vacations, and awaiting the next global tragedy which is sure to bring society as we know it to its knees. I’m doing ok, really.